Fun, funny, caring, and beloved
Troy was the light in the room and a catalyst for fun. He was a warm, compassionate, and loving person who never met a stranger. He wore his heart on his sleeve, was a skilled listener, and a fiercely loyal friend. “Troy also had a great bullshit detector,” his mom said, ‘and no tolerance for mean people.’ He was a leader from his earliest days – regardless of the direction, though as he matured, he led forward.
Troy was athletic, played basketball, soccer, and varsity football as a freshman; his well-trained soccer leg made him a good kicker. His mom was his biggest cheerleader, and Troy’s father was a supportive volunteer coach.
Most people who met Troy would never imagine he suffered from the disease of addiction. He was also dealing with PTSD, bipolar depression, and anxiety. Despite these challenges, he was always a joy. He was positive, smiling, and someone people naturally gravitated to. He could make the saddest person smile or the most closed person open up. “That was his superpower,” his mom stated.
The family was a four-person unit, celebrating the little things in life and traveling the world together. They spent several New Year’s Eve’s on Caribbean cruises, hugging and clinking champagne glasses at midnight, took a helicopter ride over a canyon in Hawaii, and mushed dog sleds in Alaska. They loved spending time with extended family and enjoyed holidays with a houseful of noise and laughter.
Troy was in eight treatment programs, each with a different focus and in varying parts of the country. They included therapeutic boarding school, wellness, and wilderness programs. It was while in treatment in Colorado that he broke his arm in a basketball game. The hospital wrongly prescribed opioids for pain. “That untimely prescription was all it took to steal his life,” his mother said.
Taylor attended a family therapy session with Troy where they constructed a pie chart about what was important in life. Taylor wants to get a tattoo based on some ideas they came up with together, family, friends, health, love, peace, and joy. Troy had five meaningful tattoos representing people in his life, including one for his mother, a tree of life with a red anthurium beneath it with peaches on the branches (her pet name for him).
Troy missed portions of high school because of his recovery journey, but he finished and went to college for two years, majoring in business. Though he was only 23, he was troubled that he didn’t yet have a concrete life plan. He knew he wanted to get married, be a father, and start a lucrative business that gave him time with his family and the ability to travel.
Since Troy’s passing, Penny has changed her career to become a Family Support Partner working with families whose children have mental health and substance use challenges. “Parents are thankful to have someone who has walked in their shoes,” she said. “We are losing so many beautiful people with entire lives ahead of them, they didn’t deserve to die.”
Troy’s mother, Penny Jobin, provided the information for this narrative.
February 19, 1996-October 12, 2019
Age 23-Lived with the disease of addiction 7 years.